Shame is so binding. It can start by doing something against your moral code and it has every intention to be hidden and stay hidden. It can take a joyous person and cause them to isolate as to create a counterfeit solace from a hurtful world.
When I read the poem above it reminded me of things I could do to remember that no matter how much hurt a person feels if they can get back in touch with their inner child they can find peace and happiness again. Here are three ways to find that inner-kid:
1. Observe the children around you- Take your own children or a loved-ones child to the park- see how they interact with the other children. Notice their care-free attitude- their lack of judgment of the other children- Their keen observance and curiosity about the other children- and questions to fulfill their curiosity. Notice their ability to forget after a big fall or maybe even their ability to forget after another child hurts them. How is it so easy for them to lack judgment? Ponder how they can live care-free with so many unknowns in front of them.
2. Lose yourself in the worlds of your children's imagination- I recently took some time to do this with my son. I call it Lego Improvisation. We just built vehicles and buildings together, created scenarios and people and acted as we went. He created voices for the people and he was annoyed by my goofy voices. There were no worries during this activity just a lot of fun with imagination and no thought of outside influence. I felt safe with my son and vice versa.
3. Hold one conversation weekly with a child. Could be a child of a family friend, a niece, a nephew or even better, your own child. Be curious about their life. Ask them about their dreams and aspirations. Ask them about their theories of life or what it takes to be happy. You might find that their theories are a whole lot simpler than yours. Ponder the insight they give and try to implement it in some way.
Cody Hawes is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker. He specializes in addiction recovery, marital therapy, grief therapy and has assisted many in overcoming mental illness. If you feel you could use some time with Cody, please call him at 1-801-721-0144.
