One of the greatest ways to overcome addictions to unwanted behavior is to produce what we call in the Sons of Helaman program "Warrior Chemistry." It is a combination of your known value system and your ability to recognize when those values are under attack. One of my clients, who has dedicated two years of his life in Africa, had a very unique way of practicing his warrior chemistry by writing "poetry jams." So, I thought I would demonstrate warrior chemistry through a poetry jam I wrote.

It's Called "Dominant Light"

To the Porn industry, Go Away!
the amount of pain you've produced causes so much decay...
moral, sexual and marital demise
can no longer be accepted by people so wise.
There's no room for it as we raise a chosen generation.
They will know more about love and its light than your counterfeit comfort and human objectification.
The filth you peddle creates so much ugly around the globe
but we will teach youth early on to learn values greater accessing their frontal lobe.
From the gift of life, love, work ethic and inclusion.
They will remember these things as they combat your criminal illusion.
You will become obsolete, an afterthought, a learned experience,
so much so IT. WILL. BE. HILARIOUS.
All you do is destroy the human spirit, and starting at very tender ages, 
I can't believe you're okay with what you put on your pages.. 
Our children are taught the beauties and glories of procreation 
and you promote and openly spread fantasy based ugly recreation.
You've created a society that sub-consciously promotes objectification
where people are robots, bosses are paychecks and bodies are instant gratification.
We are sick of you, go away,
stop tearing up families, stop progressing the moral decay.
There is no demand for you and you know it,
to you, bodies are paychecks so YOU EMPLOY it.
You are criminal,
you traffic the vulnerable, the forgotten, the insecure, making them subliminal.
They are so down trodden you pounce as if they're prey,
only you come out on top and they have to pay...
the price of addiction, worthlessness and years of intensive rehab.
You could care less though because there is always fresh meat you can nab.
You will come clean, you will eventually make it right.
You will have a change of heart to be able to face your demons at midnight.
It's a shame that you'll keep on going... so will I.
I will train valiant soldiers, validate the betrayed, and fight like a dragon til the day I die.
You will never win, your only satisfaction is temporal,
there will be no demand because our fight DAY IN and DAY OUT is ETERNAL!

To the victims of this dirt.
You can seek refuge, you don't have to endure the hurt.
I know they manipulate you with glamour, riches and popularity
but they're just biding their time until you fade into obscurity.
To those overcoming and have overcome this huge affliction.
Hold on tight you will get your vindication.
It will come through heightened senses, increased confidence and clarity.
There is no stopping you and no END to your prosperity.
You are fighting something that some think needs no fighting,
you will influence them and you will influence others, the energy you bring will be igniting...
virtue, beauty and light you will continue to seek,
there is no better feeling than slaying an opponent so sleek.
Not saying it will be easy or will be without effort
but your ability to overcome weakness and adversaries will be so much the better.
Unfortunately there is a powerful enemy and he is relentless and sly
but you will be victorious with your warrior cry.
It comes through prayer, action and confidence in your ability to dominate.
There will be so much strength, so much power even the greatest leaders in the world will try to imitate.
So one last message, a battle cry,
Light will always overcome the dark, an energy so dominate it cannot be denied.
    

Cody Hawes, LCSW LLC is a clinician for the Sons of Helaman program and Life Changing Services. For more information on the Sons of Helaman Program go to lifechangingservices.org.

      

3 Steps to Train the Addicted Brain

The brain is the most powerful tool we have in our body. If we know how it works, we can use it to achieve our greatest potential. One of the biggest downfalls of our brain is its instant gratification especially with unwanted behavior. Consider Pornography, when a brain is exposed to it, it is given a dose of dopamine comparable to heroin without the financial burden. After continued use, the brain reinforces a trodden down neural-pathway that is not easy to overcome. Through this process it creates associations... if you are feeling any type of negative emotion- Porn can be your band-aid. If you are feeling bored- Porn can create a fantasy world full of variety. The addicted brain is extremely quick to send the the most pleasured fantasy-based solutions- drugs, video games, tv marathons, cutting, food or anything that can give you a release from the pain.    

So, here are three steps to begin to change those associations. Since I work with mostly pornography addicted brains I will use that as an example.

First- it is essential that we know our value system that opposes the addiction. For most people, Pornography is not a value for them but they do value a life without it. A wonderful place to start is to ask yourself, "how do I want my brain to view the human body in regards to sex?" The majority in this world don't want to be viewed as objects and I am assuming they would want the same for others. So you've got to know your personal values around it. Personally, I view the human body as beautiful, virtuous, something divinely created by a God I love. I also view sex as something beautiful, an expression of ultimate safety with your spouse, a bond that can create an all-consuming love. I also see it as something that gives us a God-given gift to create life.

Second- Once we have our value system in place and our philosophy around it is sound, it is important to create a remembrance system around it. This could be a key word or phrase that you are exposed to at least three times a day. People can use their bathroom mirrors and a dry-erase marker to remember, others can use the alarms on their phone with phrases appearing as their alarm goes off. This causes the brain to create a strong neural pathway for the value that overrides the brains desire to use pornography. Remember the brain goes to instant gratification when in distress so to have a counteracting force against that is vital.

Third- Go on the offensive- do something that reinforces the neural pathway. If a person is constantly feeling they are under attack by the brain's desire to watch pornography, that puts them on the defensive and their brain will get agitated and want a quick fix. Choose an action every day that reinforces your value system, write about your philosophy for change, serve a family member, create a new connection with a neighbor, follow up with a friend on social media, go treat your body to exercise or hard work.

Remember the more we reinforce connections with our true value system, the more our brain will feel at ease. The associations our brain makes will change for the better as we focus on our values. It will not need to feed off fantasy worlds if it's given the nutrition from our remembered moral codes.

For more philosophy and science around addiction recovery strategies please refer to Maurice Harker's book "Like Dragon's Did They Fight", research the studies and writings of Dr. Donald Hilton, Mark Chamberlain's "Will Power is Not Enough" and his website lovehealsporn.com, lifechangingservices.org and fightthenewdrug.org.

Cody Hawes LCSW is a licensed clinician for the Sons of Helaman program. He specialiazes in addiction recovery, marital therapy and mental health recovery. He can be reached at 1-801-721-0144.